The Sexuality of Women
Soul Connection, A Healthy Body & the Desire to Make It Happen
The sexuality of women is one of the great mysteries of life: sensuality dawns and sets, ebbs and flows through our various stages in life. To closely study and appreciate the complexity within female sexuality is to truly enter the sphere of the feminine.
As a naturopathic physician and gynecology specialist, I have the great honor of sharing the experiences of women by acting as a guide to achieve optimal health. Each woman with her distinct anatomy embodies the fullness of what being female can be. All sizes, shapes, colors, moods, personalities, styles, and hormonal status are in our world to experience, witness, appreciate, and love. Our collective female bodies are the reflections of our lives, our children, our choices, and the familial ancestries and genetics that have created us.
First, a few facts about the female anatomy: A fully engorged clitoral system, which is common during arousal and orgasm, is thirty times as large as the external clitoral glans and shaft in an unaroused state. This is at least as large as the male penis. The clitoris (female glans) contains between six and eight thousand sensory nerve endings. This is the most neurologically dense tissue in the human body, male or female. The neurological strength and power of the female orgasm is unmatched.
The joy of lovemaking is a lifelong activity. I always put it on the list of good forms of exercise as it is a part of life that requires attention and cultivation. I recently co-taught a women’s sexuality class with a sex therapist colleague, and I was pleasantly surprised at the spunk and pure fun involved within the sex life of the 40 years and older women in the class. The ages of the women ranged from 32 to 73 and they were from diverse ethnic backgrounds. Just when you think or assume things may be slowing down, or otherwise, think again.
All too often, lovemaking is the part of life that becomes neglected or abandoned, forgotten about or devalued. The curious activities of busy making such as house chores, errands, parental duties, life responsibilities like a job or two or three, too much time spent in the tantalizing world of electronics and computers, or the simple rebound fatigue effect from these activities can put a massive damper on the libido. The good life, as we each define it, often has many worthy requirements for success.
Unfortunately, the price is often the time you may have spent making love. Sexual dysfunction is a common complaint for men and women. Other reasons behind not living the dream of a great sex life may include physical issues related to illness or mental emotional issues rooted in past experiences or psychological trauma, while some individuals simply have not yet found a partner.
Hormonal issues may play a major role. Fortunately, hormonal lab tests are easy and relatively inexpensive for both men and women. Within the realm of naturopathic medicine, there are many options for hormonal treatment that do not necessarily include taking hormone supplements. Herbal medicine, homeopathy, cleanse and detoxification programs, nutritional support, and bio-identical hormone replacement therapies may benefit an individual with hormonal imbalance.
The psychology of relationships is one of the most crucial elements in the sexuality of adults. We are complex beings created out of complicated overlapping histories, family backgrounds, religions, and distinct values, yet we miraculously manage to find the one person who is so attractive and special. For some it may be a lifelong partner, for others it may be a new person all the time, which ultimately turns into a series of sexual experiences with various people. Define it as love or animal magnetism, but sexual attraction and body chemistry do not lie. It can be intoxicating and cause people to do all kinds of seemingly crazy things.
It is the life of a woman, young or old, that tells the stories of our shared histories. The development of our bodies, the monthly cycle of menstruation, our sexual awakening as young women, motherhood, adult maturity in the midlife, and the transition into the wise empowered elder—they are all experienced as different stages, each of us in our unique time. We continually redefine what it is to be feminine, adjusting to our needs and desires as products of a modern world. All the while, our bodies continue to pulse and we experience the instincts and pleasure centers that have been passed down through the ages and generations of our great grandmothers. Not until recent years have women had the freedoms and choices that many of us experience now, particularly in the western world.
Sexuality is an essential part of a well balanced healthy life. In its many shapes and forms, the human body is the utopia of sensual bliss and satisfaction. It is the simple pleasures in life that allow for all else to fall away and bring perspective to what we do, who we are, and the lives we lead. There is not anything in the world that can compare to the shared experience of love and pure joy created between two lovers.